House-husbands should become part of the new normal to preserve the institution of marriage and family, observed the Madras High Court recently while dealing with a matrimonial case.

A Division Bench of Justices GR Swaminathan and MD Sumathi questioned why only women are generally expected to be homemakers, noting that it is a gender neutral term.

The Bench added that even the Supreme Court has recognised that the work carried out by homemakers have enourmous economic value.

"If there can be house wives, there can be house husbands also. Let this become a new normal. We are of the view that this would help preserve the institution of marriage and family. The expression home maker is gender neutral," the Court observed in its September 23 ruling.

The Court noted that, unlike in Western societies, in Indian culture, marriage was historically rooted in family as the core social unit, where the husband was the financial provider and the wife managed domestic duties.

"Both the roles are entitled to equal respect. This position has been changing over the last half a century ... Till a while ago, women would happily introduce themselves as house wives. These days, they put on an embarrassed look and say 'just a house wife', even though there is nothing to be embarrassed about it. House wives are not 'little women' (to borrow the famous title of the book by Louisa May Alcott. She famously said “I would rather be a free spinster and paddle my own canoe')," the Court added.

The shifting dynamics have seen career-driven women increasingly skip marriage because they view it as an impediment, it went on to observe.

This situation could be remedied if men do not shy away from becoming homemakers too, the Court said.

"Women are also increasingly becoming career oriented. We note that this is taking a toll in many relationships. Particularly, in IT sector and other professions. Marriage is not proving to be a win-win proposition for career women. Since such women see marriage as an impediment to their career prospects, they choose to skip it altogether. The number of unmarried women is on the rise. The situation can probably be remedied if husbands would opt to be homemakers," it observed.

The Court made these observations while hearing cross-appeals filed by an estranged doctor couple against a family court order in a matrimonial case. The family court had dismissed both the wife’s plea for restitution of conjugal rights and the husband’s petition for divorce on grounds of cruelty.

"Marriages may make both the parties unhappy. But the outcome of an adversarial litigation must make at least one party happy. But this Judge succeeded in making both unhappy," the High Court observed.

The Court found that the wife, a dentist, stayed back with her parents to care for the couple's two children while her husband pursued advanced cardiology qualifications.

Marital relations soured after the husband expressed that he wished to move out of the home the couple shared with his in-laws.

"The husband was comfortable with a particular arrangement till he qualified himself fully and to his satisfaction. Once he blossomed into a successful professional, the male ego asserted itself in all its ‘glory.’ What worked for a decade and during Covid ceased to be feasible any more," the Court noted.

It also took note of the wife's lament that she had made sacrifices in her education and career to take care of the family while her husband pursued higher qualifications.

"We could sense that while the husband was focussing on sharpening his skills, the wife’s abilities have become rather blunt. It would have been just if the husband who is professionally successful acknowledges the role played by the wife in taking care of the family by mothering two children. But when the husband abandons midway, the wife is literally left nowhere," the Court pointed out.

The Court proceeded to suggest that the husband make a fair offer to compensate his wife. The husband offered a ₹2.5 crore financial settlement, to which the wife agreed.

Finding the marriage broken down irretrievably, the Court proceeded to grant a divorce, provided the man deposits ₹1.5 crore of the settlement to his wife's bank account within three months. The Court added that ₹50 lakh each is to be deposited in the names of their two minor children within one year thereafter.

[Read Judgment]